Pre-divorce mediation is a way to go through divorce proceedings amicably, while minimizing cost. The benefits of pre-divorce mediation cannot be overstated; indeed, mediation offers an avenue that avoids expensive litigation and the acrimony it engenders. I have handled several mediations successfully, and would like to explain how it works.
To initiate the mediation process, both husband and wife must first meet with a family law attorney who is certified as a mediator. The first order of business in this meeting is to establish the role of the attorney. Once agreement has been reached that the attorney will act solely as a mediator–representing neither husband nor wife, dealing with all matters concerning the divorce–subsequent meetings focus on the substantive and outstanding issues between the divorce parties.
The resolution of some such issues-child custody, alimony, and the division of property, to name a few-may be long drawn. However, through skillful mediation that is sensitized to the individual needs of the divorce parties, an experienced attorney can help move the process forward. Take for example how pre-divorce mediation attorneys deal with the division of property, which, among other things, includes the distribution of all savings and investments, 40Ks, pensions, automobiles, marital homes, and personal property, as well as joint and personal debts such as credit cards, home equity lines, and mortgages. In pre-divorce mediation, both parties are tasked with listing all assets and liabilities in their possession, jointly and individually. An affidavit is then prepared in order to prevent fraudulent property claims. In the end, this transparency allows for the divorce to be resolved in a just manner.
If a resolution becomes impossible through mediation, then the mediator steps out of the case, and the parties would then retain attorneys to litigate in a more traditional fashion.
On the other hand, if mediation works and all issues are resolved, then a settlement agreement is drafted. The divorce parties can decide to have the settlement agreement reviewed by an attorney of each party’s choosing, or the mediator can pre-package everything and draft pleadings for each party to appear In Pro Per (without attorneys). The parties then go through the system-the mediator still monitoring them- without the need for attorneys and at no additional expense, other than the normal divorce filing fees.
I have found that this is an effective means of resolving a divorce where people are trying to handle things in a very simple and amicable, cost-effective fashion. In this economy, this is a way to get divorced while minimizing the legal cost, the emotional cost, along with the time spent in the legal system, with court appearances being kept to a minimum.
I am an Orange County, California Divorce Attorney and this article is a part of series that details the divorce process. When you subscribe to my newsletter which is linked below you will have access to all of my articles. This article is not intended as and should not be relied upon as legal advice or as the creation of an attorney-client relationship. Feel free to contact me at Jon@oc-familylawyers.com to arrange a free confidential consultation. Thank you for reading.
Sometimes divorce comes as a surprise but oftentimes conflict builds up over a long period time and then explodes in DIVORCE!
Regardless of how it happens, you must take these steps to protect your children, your finances, and yourself. And remember there is a right way and a wrong way. Follow these steps and you will protect your interests in a manner that is reasonable and fair.
Unfortunately, in divorce one of the spouses is at a disadvantage because of that suffers due to an equal bargaining power. follow these steps, however, and you won’t be disadvantaged. Any utopian world, your new spouse would work everything out fairly calm sometimes though these proceedings become adversary. The tips below will help you protect your interests. Note, however, you should make a good faith effort to work things out and compromise before acting recklessly.
Your first priority should be to protect her children in the event you have children. To do so: () obtain a TRO; (2) do not allow your spouse to leave and take the children; (3) stay in the family home; and (4) insist on a 50% split for parenting time. First, obtain a temporary restraining order, which specifically prevents your spouse from taking the children out of state. You want to avoid a custody battle that extends across state lines. If you do this that will help with the second item listed above, not allowing your spouse to take the kids and run. Third, if you have moved out of the family home you may have seriously impacted your ability to obtain custody.
However, if you have already moved out you should move back immediately. This may cause stressful living situation but you can attempt to defuse the situation by suggesting a time sharing agreement until custody and divorce issues are resolved. Fourth, you should not agree to settle for less than 50% custody. Your spouse does not have any greater rights to spend more time with your children and you. Furthermore, if you accept less time now you will be setting a precedent for the future. Make sure to insist upon a 50-50 split
To protect your finances and yourself: make sure to visit my website that has the rest of this article in its entirety. And while you’re there make sure to sign up for my newsletter! Thank you. Very truly yours, Jon D. Alexander, Esq.
About the Author:
Before You Hire The Wrong Attorney For Your Divorce Proceeding Hire An Aggressive, Qualified Orange County Lawyer And If You Are Concerned About
The definition of the word “divorce” is the dissolution of legal matrimony between two people. In child custody, the decision requires a judge and also the splitting of the couple’s estates. Divorce is looked at and performed in different ways across the world.
A no fault divorce is when the law does not require the couple to provide proof of fault, instead one can cite incompatibility, irreconcilable differences or irremediable breakdown of the marriage.
An at fault divorce is where the party filing for termination of marriage provides proof that the other party committed an act incompatible to marriage.
A collaborative decision is one in which lawyers and financial advisers help the person to make an independent decision. But, attorneys are not permitted to go into the courtroom while the process is going on.
If the divorce is uncontested then the couple will come to an agreement on dividing property and child visitation before they come before the court authorities.
Mediated divorce is where the whole process is pegged on a mediator who provides a means of communication between the husband and wife and also provides suggestions to resolve the differences. Once the parties getting divorced come to a mutual agreement with their mediator, they provide their terms to the court officials.
It is wise to identify your joint assets, sometimes called community property, regardless of which sort of divorce you opt for. These are all the possessions acquire by the couple all through their time in matrimony. Assets may be a house or a car while debts will be any type of loan, including a mortgage.
For those contemplating divorce, it’s good if you try and follow some of these tips during the process. Do not always to expect the judge to deliver a judgment in your favor and always address the judge with respect.
Try to leave any hostility you may have towards your spouse out of the courtroom. This will help you keep your focus throughout the entire process. Also, take notes, as your attorney may be too busy to write everything down. Supply the courtroom with the necessary papers. Expect to stay in the courtroom for awhile. Processing takes time. If possible, try to settle as much as possible out of court, this makes it possible for you to be in control to some degree.
This is an interesting account of a woman who was able to fall back on her self-taught investing know-how to make ends meet following her divorce.
“The divorce taught me all kinds of things,” says Kaegh, a former high school administrator. Though the couple had signed a pre-nuptial agreement, he stalled on the settlement.
“I don’t need a lot of money,” she says, “but because I had to live so cheaply for those years, it taught me even more financial care. The only investments I did not get rid of during that time was some bullion I had.
Here’s an informative 3 minute video which explains how the law treats pensions in matters.
Lawyer FAQ: Do I have to share my pension when I divorce?
Toronto divorce lawyer Steven Benmor discusses the family law question “Do I have to share my pension when I divorce?”
Keep in mind that the rules may be different in other provinces. For example, he says the presumption is that assets owned prior to marriage are not subject to division. But in some provinces, Nova Scotia for example, even these assets are subject to division.
